Do you want to give your sub a powerful orgasm as a reward for being so good? I’ll explain some strategies and offer a brief overview on running a simple BDSM scene with all of these aspects in this guide for a dominant guy in a D/s relationship with a submissive woman.
Four things contribute to an intense orgasm.
1. Establish a submissive position
2. Create a sense of anticipation
3. Edging
4. Commands (dominant)
Let’s look at each one and see how they work together to create a powerful female orgasm that can be used to spice up your D/s relationship.
1. Establish a Submissive Positioning
I feel that a large part of orgasm (more so in women than men) is psychological.
Orgasm can only happen when your foot is off the brake, and the accelerator is pushed.
One way to use an accelerator is by positioning your submissive. If they want that dynamic, then every situation in which the power dynamic is in your favor and they are not in control is beneficial.
Kneeling, bending down, tied up, across your lap…all of these submissive positions can help you assert your dominance and get your sub’s arousal reaction going.
2. Creating a Sense of Anticipation
Anticipation is another factor that contributes to sexual pleasure.
You know how you feel when you’re fully clothed yet know you’ll have sex later that evening but have to wait? That’s the vibe you’re going for with your sub.
She knows she’ll have an intense orgasm at some point, but she has no idea when or how you’ll give it to her.
3. Edging
Edging is the technique of bringing someone as close to orgasm as possible, then halting stimulation and allowing arousal levels to drop before restarting.
Theoretically, the more times this edging cycle is repeated, the stronger the orgasm that results. I can attest to the fact that this is frequently the case.
As a side note, if you want to stay in bed longer, practice edging yourself while masturbating. Get as close as you can, then stop stroking and squeeze your PC muscle (the one you use to keep yourself from peeing) as hard as you can.
To effectively edge, you must recognize when your sub is on the verge of orgasm. Although this is far from a precise science; you can employ a combination of the following techniques:
•Beware of the body language: Back arches, pulling legs together, curling toes, grasping your hand are some of the signs to look out for—these may or may not apply to your sub. She might even react in a completely different way. All that counts is that you learn to recognize the subtle cues she gives out when she’s on the verge of orgasm.
Vocalizations: She moans, grunts, falls silent, screams loudly, and tells you she’s coming. Everybody is different, as previously said, but with practice, you’ll be able to recognize her telltale signs.
Arousal scale: The arousal scale is a measurement of how active you are. For me, it’s the simplest and most effective. Tell your sub that 1 is not aroused at all and 10 is having an orgasm. She should inform you when she reaches a specific number.
BDSM scene to reach orgasm is not rocket science—it is more like a walk in the park; know how it is done.